


Dandies vs. Daddies Olympics

by waitingfor_otabae (waitingfor_margo)



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: But whatever, I mean not at all, I swear I'm an intellectual person who just happened to accidentally fall into a trash can, I'm so so sorry, M/M, and I liked what I found there so I stayed a little longer and made a fic of it, and one Yuri each, blame everyone else, but I didn't make the rules, daddies vs. dandies olympics to be specific, did I say sorry?, don't blame me, haha course I did, if I hadn't written this someone else would have done it and I couldn't let this happen, insert more useless tags here, like really really sorry, logical really, not that this is fair, now shut me up already and take this from me, or this one anon on tumblr, so yeah team daddy consists of four Otabeks and team dandy of four Otabeks, to talk about the amount of Otabeks and Yuris again, whatever this is the most silly daddies vs. dandies fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-07
Updated: 2017-03-07
Packaged: 2018-09-30 15:28:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10165985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waitingfor_margo/pseuds/waitingfor_otabae
Summary: This is not my fault, that's all I can say to that





	

The people in the stadium are cheering as the commentator starts to speak; not a single seat is empty.

„Ladiiieees and Gentlemen! Welcome to the competition of the century, the match of the masters, welcome to this year’s Dandies vs. Daddies Olympics!”

The crowd is roaring.

“On the left you can see team Daddy, standing confidently in their team’s uniform, a tight black muscle t-shirt, showing their biggest asset: their physical strength! Applause for team Daddy!”

The stadium is filled with clapping hands and hysterical screams from young fans. Signs are waved and shown to the camera, proudly declaring “Team Daddy” or “If You Win I’ll Be A Good Boy”. 

“And on the right side, ladies and gentlemen, I welcome team Dandy! They decided on a dark green dress coat with a matching top hat, a scarf with a simple pattern and white gloves. Those Dandies really have an eye for details! Applause!”

Again the stadium is making noise, less animalistic but nonetheless excited. Young ladies rearrange their dress hats to look presentable and opt for reserved expressions and small waves with their glove clad fingers instead of screeching and jumping up and down like the fans of the other team.

“The five categories of this year’s Dandies vs. Daddies Olympics are as follows: First both teams will have to show their persuasive side in “Worm Charming”! To convince a worm to leave its hole is not the easiest of tasks so let’s hope the best for both our teams. Next will be “Stone Skimming”! A task that demands coordination skills of our teams! Then the participants will have to prove their strength in “Oil Wrestling” and the last challenge will be to cross the finishing line with their car and picking up their Yuri before doing so! Every task will be solved by only one member of both teams. We all hope that our Dandies and Daddies will make the best of this year’s categories and that we all will enjoy our time! With this being said: Let the Olympics begin!” 

*

“The first of the Daddies and of the Dandies are getting on their marks, before them a small field of wet earth in which each participant’s worm is waiting. The referee is giving the sign! The competition starts! The Daddy is already on the patch of earth, looking around, frantically looking for a sign of the worm! At the same time the Dandy gets out a spotless white handkerchief that he slowly lays down to kneel on the patch! This is true devotion to the challenge! He seems to try and talk to the small animal and oh! Is this a tiny head poking out of the earth? Is it working? Here comes the Daddy, still looking for the tiny worm and he is so wrapped up in his searching he doesn’t see the Dandy! Nooo, the crowd is howling, Daddy stepped on Dandy’s worm and has by now trodden down all the earth! No hole is left through which the worms could have come out, too bad! The referee is blowing his whistle, the game is over!”

*

“And here we have our next pair, ready to prove themselves in the next challenge: Stone Skimming! Let’s hope this will get better than the last match! The participants get into position in front of the small simulated lake, stones in hand! Every one of them only got ONE try! This will be tricky! Oh, the referee gave the sign, it starts! Aah, both of them are taking their time, not rushing but calculating how to hold and throw the stone, tactically clever! But now, both of them move their arms back, they strike out and- Nooo, the crowd is howling! Both stones met in the middle and crashed into the lake! Too bad, again no points for the teams.”

*

“Oil Wrestling is next, ladies and gentlemen! The staff is bringing over buckets of oil for the next two, this will be interesting! Ah, the Daddy is getting ready, pulling his shirt off and- ooohhh, well, and his trousers and every piece of clothing he had on him, ladies and gentlemen, he really wants to win this thing! He oils his body but what is the Dandy doing? He just stands there, not looking convinced! His head held high he withdraws from the scene, what, will this mean he refuses to accept this challenge?! This would mean the win for team Daddy in this category! But what happens now?! The Daddy jumps forward and sprints toward the Dandy! The Dandy tries to draw aside without letting his façade drop! But nooo, the Daddy got him, he will bring him down!! Oh but what is that?! The Daddy is stumbling, his oily feet are his disadvantage! In a last attempt to ground himself he grabs the Dandy’s dress coat and- aahh, both are falling down! None of them seems able to get up again, that means no point again!”

*

"Our last pair gets to their cars, ready to win this final challenge for their teams. Team Daddy wants to win with a lamborghini murcielago lp 670-4 cabriolet, whereas Team Dandy trusts their morgan plus e concept! The goal is to get their Yuri and cross the line with him. Surely our champions will give their best! The Daddy waves and smiles confidently into the crowd, the fans are cheering! The Daddy is his usual composed self, not letting on if he might be nervous facing this last chance to win these Olympics. Truly brave men, both of them! But now, the two of them now face ahead, their hands on the steering wheel, waiting for the referee to- ah, the signal! And off they go! The Daddy is bolting and is outrunning the Dandy! The Dandy seems to not be in a rush, he must be sure of winning or maybe he can’t drive any faster? Yet again his facial expression doesn’t tell us anything. Ah, now the Daddy is arriving at the Yuri checkpoint! This looks good for Team Daddy! The Daddy looks like he is not unhappy to see the blond boy, pulls the Yuri on the passenger seat and starts driving again! He gets closer and closer to his destination!! But what is that?! The Yuri suddenly sits himself in the Daddy’s lap! The Daddy only has one hand on the steering wheel while his other- oh please! There are children here! The Daddy seems to have changed his mind about this competition, his car pulls turns left and out of the stadium! 

Phew, my ladies and gentlemen, this can only mean that Team Dandy will- oh? What now?”

The clock strikes five. The Dandy who just slowly approached his Yuri checkpoint stops his car. As if out of nowhere he produces a cup of tea out of his jacket pocket and takes a sip. One half of the audience does the same. Soon friendly chatter starts to spread around the stadium.

“…”

“Ladies and gentlemen, I think this might be the end of this year’s Dandies vs. Daddies Olympics… We’ve seen great challenges, difficult tasks and their- solutions. We laughed, we cried, we have losers and…I hope we’ll seen a contest this thrilling again soon. Have a nice day.”

**Author's Note:**

> compliment my writing trash on Tumblr @ http://no-way-no-gay.tumblr.com/ and my drawing trash @ https://cocoastainseverywhere.tumblr.com/


End file.
